Language police need to ‘man’ up and grow a pair

There’s a new police force in town, infecting society from a Trojan high horse of humbuggery,  armed with nothing but judgement and self aggrandisement.

It’s not the fashion police- though we could do with its omnipresence in Ireland- no, no it’s the language police. The one that make you break out in a cold sweat when you call someone who’s black, black.

Egged on by numpties like Justin Trudeau, Canadian Prime Minister, who led the fray for making the country’s national anthem gender-neutral, this movement is growing in ridiculousness and arbitrary time wasting.

One can only laugh- “O Canada” will have its third line reworded from “true patriot love in all thy sons command” to the new and improved lyrics, “in all of us command.”

Mr Trudeau, described as a “positive step towards gender equality.”  He also thinks the word ‘mankind’ should be ‘peoplekind.’ A recent transaction with a feminist audience member during a town hall meeting, thrust this idea into life. He says he was joking- I’m not so sure. He said, it was more inclusive. Of what? Horse shit?

In the US last year, the Marine Corps issued a ‘mandate’ to remove “man” from Military Occupational Specialty (MOS) job titles such as “Infantry Assault Man” and “Basic Infantryman,” and to replace gender-specific endings with “marine.”

I laugh at the use of ‘mandate.’ Is that not suggestive, especially as it includes the word ‘date.’’ “I think you will find that women and men don’t have monolithic, gender-based opinions on the issue of semantics or integration, and that is a good thing,” says West Point graduate Paula Broadwell, who runs the Think Broader Foundation, a non-profit focused on how gender is represented in the media and society.

Again- I laugh a the use of se’man’tics plus the other circumlocutions. Ever since women are allowed to fight on the front line, it’s important they are not viewed not as objects, but as equals, she suggested. Don’t you mean ‘wo’s? Aren’t we deeply offended by this use of ‘man’ in my female race- oh wait male again. All this has to go.

By the way, I don’t think women should be on the front line- something about us being physically weaker, I dunno. But then again, us being the fairer race could be humbug and not rooted in biology, as many activists claim.

Anyway, luckily we don’t indulge in this kind of language imbecility in Ireland and no one has lost their heads.

Oh no wait. Trinity College is planning on dropping the ‘man’ from the word ‘Freshman,’ a name commonly given to first year students and replacing it with ‘Fresh’ in order to be inclusive to all gender identities.

One wouldn’t want to offend the two people who could be offended, so why not just get on everyone else goat.

I was a freshman in Trinity College in 1993 and would like to exercise my rights as a member of the alumni say no to this facetious nonsense.

Also here’s a tip- you can never satisfy anyone. If you were to suggest a Led Zeppelin reunion concert in the middle of the Phoenix Park on a hot summers’ day with Pink Floyd doing warm up and Freddie Mercury rising from the dead to sing Innuendo, you’d get two people going – ‘no we don’t like that.’

Don’t mind those two people- it’s a really good idea.

Last year, the great Jordan B Peterson, professor of psychology at the University of Toronto, who has just entered the mainstream after he eviscerated Cathy Pearson, the loudmouthed feminist presenter on leftie Channel 4 News, received two written warnings at said university following his announcement that he would refuse to use the preferred gender pronouns of students and faculty who don’t identify with their biological gender.

Dr Peterson was particularly frustrated by the alternative pronouns ‘they’ or ‘ze’ and ‘zir’, used by some as alternatives to ‘she’ or ‘he’. The use of such pronouns is mandatory under a recently instituted Canadian law, Bill C-16.

He managed to set off a political and cultural firestorm that has yet to cool down. “There’s been an explosion in gender identity categories and now people want a pronoun for each of them,” he said when referring to an incident at a free speech rally the university in 2016 in which he was drowned out by a white noise machine and where pushing and shoving broke out in the crowd.

Needless to say, radical transgender activists were furious.

‘I’m not going to cede linguistic territory to post-modernist neo-Marxists,’ he said. And rightly so. My advice to the angry mob who gathered around him-  go to the pub go waste your best years enjoying yourselves. You’ll all have jobs soon and no time for this kind of tomdickery.

Don’t actions speak louder than words anyway? What a waste of time and energy.

I, like Dr Peterson am a free speech fundamentalist – exercising my right to say whatever the hell I want, and I’m saying- go out, have fun. Grow a pair and man up. Or should I just say… ‘up?’